Written by Bluebella
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Topics: Gay, Superman, Lois Lane

Friday, 8 May 2009

image for Superman confesses "I'm gay" - Romance with Lois Lane was just a cover-up
Crickey! How could she not have noticed?

Metropolitas - Man of Steel, saviour of the world, Superman has finally admitted he's gay.

Superman first graced our TV screens in black and white in 1954 and followed up with a series of successful movies two decades later. In the second movie he hooked up with long time lover, Lois Lane, but wiped her memory at the end of the film, claiming it was for "her own good".

But the man of steel has been hiding a dark secret for over 50 years: he's a homosexual. Superman made the startling confession in Gay Superheroes and Superstars magazine May 2009 edition.

Lois Lane has refused to comment on the confession but is said to be completely devastated and fallen into the arms of long-time platonic friend Clark Kent, who is definitely not gay.

Some say Lane knew all along her long time lover was gay, but refused to accept the blinding facts: the skin-tight, bright blue outfit, the huge red speedos, the sun-yellow belt and the curl in the middle of his forehead - not to mention the very un-masculine line "I fight for truth and justice in the American way." Lane also denied the facts when Superman refused to sleep with her on the basis that his penis was made of steel and could cause great pain, even hospitalisation. She chose instead to believe his penis story and deny his odd choice of wardrobe. She also denied the glaringly obvious when she caught Superman in a gay bar. He claimed that the DJ of the club had slipped on a drink spill and called for help, which he promptly answered. Superman was merely checking out the safety of the other clubbers before he departed the club.

Clark Kent, a very close friend of Superman's, has told the magazine he suspected all along and was constantly asking his friend where on earth, or Krypton, he got his fabulous bright threads from.

Kent and Lane are now dating, while at the same time Kent has offered a supportive shoulder to his gay friend Superman.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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