Written by Bluebella
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Topics: Marilyn Manson

Friday, 8 May 2009

image for Marilyn Manson's ex-wife claims he reads War & Peace and adopts abandoned Chihuahuas
Manson would often fall asleep on his War & Peace - without removing his make-up. Doctors claim this is dangerous.

Salem, SA - "Satanic" rocker Marilyn Manson's ex-wife Dita Von Teese has claimed he is not what he seems.

Many people think Manson is a Satan-worshiping, lamb sacrificing freak. Not so, says Von Teese, who was married to the man for several year up until she filed for divorce in 2005. She claims Manson was so dull that she actually couldn't stand it anymore, hence the divorce.

"I'd try to seduce him" she purrs in a sultry voice, "and he would just pick up his novel, War & Peace and glue his eyes to the page. He's read the damn thing 300 times you know and was even challenged by Guiness Book of Records to read the book just another three times to become the world record holder. He shied away from that, worried his fans would find out. I thought his obsession with huge, big-worded novels would be over after that - until I caught him reading the Encyclopaedia - and I don't mean the internet version - I mean the actual 56 volume A - Z Encyclopaedia! But that wasn't the only problem, he also adopts abandoned Chihuahuas from animal shelters - bloody little rats! I can't stand the things! Mads was so attached to them he'd dress them up in baby's clothes and rock them to sleep in cradles!"

Von Teese claims she was so repulsed by her husband's sick behaviour that she could bare no more and finally walked out on him, taking all the women's clothes in the entire house, leaving her husband with nothing to wear.

Manson has remained silent on the divorce but is soon to be releasing his cover version of Michael Bolton's How Am I Supposed to Live Without You, plus various other love songs written and covered after the heartbreak.

He is currently up to Volume V of the Encylopedia and plans to release his new album Love Songs for My Love as soon as he's finished the series. Fans are said to be waiting with baited breath.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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