Written by Rich T
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Friday, 1 May 2009

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Gratho in his heyday

UK funnyman Graham Norton, 59, and a devoted father of 8, died on stage on Tuesday night during his one man tour of Brighton.

Norton, real name Norman Gratho, took his self titled show "Norton" to Brighton's Little Theatre, a former church in the heart of Brighton, for a one off performance to a surprise audience of 79 specially invited members of the religious community and volunteers from the Women's Institute.

Gratho

Gratho, whose stage name is Graham Norton, failed to muster a single laugh during his risque performance. At one point during the show he tripped over the microphone lead and fell to one knee letting out a little yelp, but even that didn't get any laughs as he persisted in delivering his unique brand of toilet humour. Norton later admitted the stumble had caused some light bruising.

Tea

Leaving the show, avid fan Doris Day, 123, commented, "Well that was sh*t!" Lifelong fan and WI volunteer, Betty Swollocks, aged 99 commented, "How sh*t was that? Would you like a cup of tea love?" Little Theatre director, Fingera Fuj, 84, declined to comment.

Bins

The performance was filmed with plans to air it on BBC SIX in the Spring of 2010. BBC spokesman, Dick Thwacker, declined to comment on the fate of the recording. Yesterday, a search of the bins outside BBC's Wood Lane studios in Hammersmith, London failed to reveal any clues, although a video cassette labelled "June Brown: Being Dot Cotton" was dicovered with metres of mangled tape hanging from its battered casing.


This isn't the first time Norton has made the headlines for the wrong reasons. He and fellow funnyman Michael Barrymore, 96, real name John Wayne, were at the centre of controversy in 1982 when they were known as the popular double act Wayne Gratho.

The act involved stuffing small furry animals into their underpants.

The RSPCA were later called in amidst fears for the animals' safety.

The pair later split and went their own way, with Barrymore going on to become a household name.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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