Bo the new black dawg in the White House reportedly kept the first black family awake for most of his first week in his new home.
The Obamas tried blanket wrapped alarm clocks, a rocking cradle that belonged to Caroline Kennedy's pony and a list of canine tranquilizers left over from Bush's Buddy who suffered from night traumas over the unnecessary war in Iraq. Nothing seemed to bring peace to long awaited family pet.
That is until Bo broke into the first couple's liquor cabinet. The desperate dog scratched and clawed his way into a nondescript wooden dresser and consumed the entire contents of Thunderbird wine contained therein.
The President admitted that it was the first good night's sleep the family has had since Bo arrived from the Kennedy compound. "I guess we should have guessed that the black irish pup would need a nightcap or five to pass out into oblivion!" Michelle told the White House Press corps whom had already passed out into oblivion.