Brave Jade Goody farted yesterday, to the relief of tabloid journalists who almost had nothing to write about her.
The fart came just in time for the deadline, meaning her face was able to stay on the front page of the newspaper that has been keeping up updated with Jade's every non-move.
"We were lucky," said PR guru Cliff Maxord. "She didn't get a visit from any weirdos holding a screwdriver, she wasn't shouting at any neighbours, and she wasn't holding the hand of her brave ex-con husband.
"I thought we were going to have to face the fact that there was no story to keep Jade in the headlines, and then right at the last moment came the fart."
Jade said the fart was a relief because she had been feeling a little pain in her abdomen, and she was glad to see it was only trapped wind. She was unable to comment further on the fart because her pain relief medication keeps her drowsy.
She was able to smile for a photographer briefly though, enabling the newspaper to describe her as "brave".
Tomorrow, Cliff Maxord hopes to bring more news about Jade's "brave" fight against privacy. "It's not like there's anything else for the papers to write about," he said.