Jade Goody, the thing that made its name by appearing on the Channel 4 shows Big Brother and Celebrity Big Brother, has told reporters that she is absolutely furious with God.
Goody, who has terminal cancer, and is expected to live only a few more months, became a household name when appearing in the TV show in 2003, and then synonymous with racism after her spat with Bollywood star Shilpa Shetty in 2007.
Jade told our reporter:
"Arm furious widdat God bloke! Araint facking ready f'dat deff bizniss yet. Just wait till ar get ap der an sort dat facker art!"
Goody added that it was "fine for God to sit up there in his giant armchair just picking off folks at random", but she had things yet to do, such as appearing in C4's new series of Big Brother 10, having her memoirs published in The Sun, and ridding the world of prejudice and racism.
Goody is an anagram of Oy, God!