Written by Jalapenoman
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Thursday, 22 January 2009

image for Miley Cyrus Allergic to Pimple Cream
Her rash is redder than her hair

Singer and actress Miley Cyrus, who plays title character Hannah Montana on the Disney Channel, is the idol of little girls and the object of affection for teenage boys all around the world. Imagine, then, the total outpouring of angst and sympathy when it was announced that she had an allergic reaction to her pimple cream and now has a skin rash on her face and bottom.

Ten year old Ashley Harper of Boise, Idaho was heartbroken. "Miley gets pimples? I thought that Miley was beyond pimples. What hope do I ever have in this world if someone as wonderful and perfect as Miley Cyrus gets puss filled zits?"

Fifteen year old Trever Kind of Orlando, Florida was also upset. "Miley's got a rash on her butt because of rubbing pimple cream on her ass zits, and all they show are pictures of the rash on her face. What is wrong with these people? Don't they know where the real story is in this? What ever happened to my right to know?"

Nine year old Guadalupe Garcia Garcia Vargas Maria De Jesus Torres Garcia of Veracruz, Mexico was another child with serious problems and issues. Since, however, no one could speak Spanish and understand her complaints (they could have easily been about her three legged dog or a burnt tortilla), they are not quoted here. She was, however, visibly upset and was wearing a faded, second hand Hannah Montana t-shirt.

Eleven year old Victoria East of Perth, Australia cried when she spoke to reporters. "If I have to see one more picture of that stupid girl or my mom buys me another notebook or backpack with her image or pair of Hannah Montana panties, I'm flying to Hollywood and killing the bitch."

Four children. Four stories. All are upset about poor Miley.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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