American actor Will Smith is to star as Hamlet, in a film version of the Shakespeare play which will be directed by Quentin Tarantino. This represents a change of direction, as previously Smith has appeared in such lighthearted films as 'Men In Black' and the TV show 'The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air', but he is confident that he can now appear in darker and more serious work.
'We changed the script a bit, though', he admitted, 'we weren't sure if I was taking myself too seriously. So now the 'to be or not to be' bit is 'Yo, Yorick! To hang out or not to hang out, baby, that's the question. Whether it's cool to diss the Bloods or to give high-fives to the cops ain't the problem, man.' And it continues: 'Gotta face the slings and bullets from Uzi 9mm's, or else get thrown in the slammer for the weekend with no parole, Homey.' See? We had to rewrite it for our target group of 14 year-old American kids, which all American movies are made for, anyway.'
The film will be shot on location in a castle in Denmark, made out of Lego, and will also star Kate Winslet as a hysterical Ophelia, and Jack Nicklaus as Prince Hamlet's father, the King whose name nobody can every remember.
'Yeah, should be a good one', Smith said, 'plenty of gold jewellery and purple clothes, and we're getting Dr. Dre to do the soundtrack. But we refused to let Eminem be the court jester, the audience might think that was kinda dumbing down Shakespeare a bit! You limeys call this food?'
Friends, Romans and countrymen were expected to flock to see the movie, including rappers King 'Earl' Lear and Julius 'Little Caesar' Caesar.