Written by Monkey Woods
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Tuesday, 6 January 2009

image for Celebrity Big Brother Show Attacked By Zombie
One of the Jacksons - not sure which

There was chaos on a scale never before seen on the set of Celebrity Big Brother tonight when, in an unscheduled incident, a Zombie attacked several housemates.

The Zombie, previously known as La Toya Jackson, bit, punched, kicked and gorged on other housemates just after 10pm, when the show had gone off-air.

La Toya is the sister of ex-Celebrity Big Brother housemate, Jermaine, and of alleged paedophile, Michael, of whom La Toya is a clone. His 14-minute video for the 1983 hit Thriller, featured members of the Jackson family as zombies in a brilliant and scary dance routine.

Other Jackson Zombies for that video included Rebbie, Jackie, Tito, Jermaine, Marlon Brando, Randy, Janet, Bianca, Robbie, Gordon, Samuel L., Diana Ross and General Stonewall, but not, as had been previously thought, Glenda.

Producers had intended publishing a list of those killed or injured, but then realised they were all D-list failures and has-beens, and didn't bother.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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