Written by Everyman
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Saturday, 3 January 2009

image for Celebrity Big Brother suspended
Celebrity Big Brother off air

Celebrity Big Brother was dramatically brought to a halt last night after the house mates ran out of conversation.

A spokesperson explaind: "We have a complex set of selection criteria when we choose the line up each year. Unfortunately we now realise that the ability to communicate with other human beings is not one of them. We have taken the unusual step of halting the broadcast whilst we carry out emergency work on the celebtrities' social skills."

This is not the first time that celebrity big brother has been at the centre of controversy. Two years ago we saw Jade Goody's career mercilessly attacked after she innocently made some highly offensive racial slurs. However, on this occasion the programme seems to be in real trouble.

A source admitted that the programme has no plan B if these stars show themselves unable to utter a meaningful syllable to each other within 24 hours. "If they aren't going to talk - they had better start some heavy petting fairly sharpish" the source said.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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