In a world exclusive, Paris Hilton will unclug her nose right here on the Spoof. She says that she has dreamt about this moment for a long time and can't wait for the occasion to come, hopefully sometime next year.
Madame Hilton will bring along a pair of regulation tweezers, cotton buds and a photographer (of course!) to create the momentous event, the first such of its kind.
Journalists will be covering the happening and Paris Hilton is excited by all the attention."All this for little ol' me, little ol' me!" she cried.
Gordon Brown is said to be so shocked and horrified by this that he will be listening to the shipping report on BBC1 instead.