Singer/songwriter Bruce Springsteen, who has a long history of supporting far left, un-American, unpatriotic, and anti-Bush activities, shocked friend and foe alike yesterday by announcing he would donate the money he will be paid to perform at half-time at the Super Bowl on February 1 to the George W. Bush Memorial Fund.
Speaking informally to a small group of reporters while sipping a glass of Chardonnay at his home in Rumson, New Jersey, Springsteen remarked, "the President has been mercilessly and unfairly criticized the last five or six years and these attacks have been wrong, terribly wrong. The Georgia W. Bush Memorial, honoring him and his accomplishments, will go a long ways towards righting these wrongs. I'm being paid an obscene about of money to play four songs, maybe three if I play Jungeland, at a football game. Donating this money to the Fund is my way of saying, 'Mr. President, I'm sorry for anything I did to suggest that you were anything less than one of our greatest presidents'"
When informed there was no such fund, Springsteen, also known as, "the Boss," exclaimed, "than I'm even prouder to donate and help get this effort off the ground. He deserves a Memorial on a par with Lincoln, Roosevelt, and the Vietnam Veterans, and in a location of equal prominence."
When asked if he had considered the physical layout or design of a Bush Memorial, Springsteen responded, "I like the simplicity of the Vietnam Veterans Memorial. The names of those who died *are* the Memorial. There is no political statement, just the names. I believe the perfect memorial for this president would be even simpler - a deep, circular hole-in-the-ground, about 25 feet in diameter, and deep enough so that, day or night, when visitors peer over the edge, the bottom can never be seen. No political statement, just the hole.