Written by Monkey Woods
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Topics: TV, Game show

Friday, 12 December 2008

image for Mastermind To Replace Black Chair With Electric Chair
Don't, for God's sake, say "Pass"

Mastermind, the quiz show made famous by Icelander Magnus Magnusson, has been at the cutting edge of 'clever entertainment' for 30 years, with contestants pitting their wits against each other, in the spotlight, sitting in the uncomfortable Black Leather chair.

Now though, the seat is to become a sight more uncomfortable if, as planned, the BBC replaces the old leather chair with a new Electric Chair!

The move is at an advanced stage, according to new Mastermind host, John Humphrys, and will add more zest to the show, more spontaneity and more pain.

The decision to 'up the ante' is also subject to approval from the Health & Safety Executive, but with massive funds at their disposal, the BBC can afford to pay the HSE off without too much difficulty.

The Chair will have the comforting appearance of a barber's chair, but packs quite a punch! Electrodes are fastened to the contestant's head as he or she takes the 'hot seat', and thereafter, if a question is answered wrongly, Mr Humphrys will administer a 200 volt shock by way of a pressure pad under his desk.

(Viewers need not worry; a wet sponge is to be fastened to the contestant's scalp to prevent the unfortunate soul from catching fire.)

The first show to be broadcast using the new format, will be broadcast in February, with specialist subjects including The Life & Times Of Bargis Tryhol, Trainspotting, The History Of Beach Volleyball, and Bus Fares In Dudley.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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