Written by Angus McFiddle
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Topics: David Tennant

Friday, 31 October 2008

image for David Tennant to be new Cillit Bang guy
One of David's pockets. I think there's a 5p down there somewhere.

David Tennant has revealed the real reason he has quit as Dr Who - he has been offered £2 million to be the new face of Cillit Bang.

"Hi, I'm Barry the Scot," David will be heard shouting at the camera at the top of his voice as he shows us how the chemical cleaner works wonders on 1p coins.

Tennant says his decision to leave Dr Who and take up an advertising career was motivated by money, but not in the way most people think.

"I have a lot of 1p coins, thanks to my starring roles," Tennant told us, "I'm earning them faster than I can spend them, and they are starting to get a bit dirty.

"I didn't want to pay someone to clean them so when Cillit Bang offered to pay me lots of money to clean them myself while being filmed, I jumped at the chance."

1p coins are not the only thing that David will be cleaning in his new starring role. He will be giving a new shine to old crockery, pewter mugs and WW2 medals as part of a sponsorship deal with the Antiques Roadshow, in which David will add value to old items by giving them a nice clean.

"Now I am not so much a timelord as a grimelord," he joked.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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