The entertainment world is all talk about the alleged gay rumors surrounding British singer Elton John's sexuality.
The fat pianist (that's 'pianist') has come under greater scrutiny this week following claims that he has possibly had secret homosexual tendencies.
The usually reclusive entertainer made a brief statement to the press while being carried to the store to purchase his monthly $100,000 flower baskets. He said that he was a "happily married man" and "very much in love with himself", but that hasn't stopped unscrupulous investigative journalists from prying into his past.
"What we know is that he's worn a Donald Duck costume, dressed like Liberace, emerged from the back of a removal van while wearing a Louis XIV outfit - in public - sung Disney songs for Princess Diana and recorded with a female impersonator", said a sleazy British newspaper man, " but so far we've discovered nothing particularly gay about him at all".
Elton Johns 'close' friend, heterosexual icon George Michael, has scoffed at the rumors: "I was just complimenting Elton on how ridiculous these stories are down at the public lavatories last night at 3 am".