Written by Monkey Woods
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Wednesday, 24 September 2008

image for TV Supernanny Jo Frost Advises Parents To Get Rid Of Their Children - Quickly!
There's something very wrong here

A well respected TV Supernanny has run into controversy this week over her advice to a particularly troublesome family on a housing estate in Liverpool. Rather than counsel them about their horrid children's behaviour, or provide self-help solutions, the buxom wonder told them to: "Get rid of them!"

The woman, who has become known as Sturdynanny, blew her gasket when she encountered the Curmudgeon family, whose 4-year-old twin sons, Stig and Darth, fought, swore and smashed-up the family's three-bedroomed flat in Toxteth, whilst their pot-smoking, beer-guzzling, stinking, snivelling, unemployed parents sat and watched from their positions in front of the telly.

Stig punched Darth. Darth kicked Stig. Mum and Dad were attacked by the twins. And so it went while the nanny observed from behind her big specs.

After considering several different courses of action - naughty chairs, TV shutdown, no sweets, removal of treats, Social Workers, Youth Offender Institutions - the nanny retreated to a safe distance away from the offenders and told the parents there was only one thing for it, and no time to wait: DROWNING - quickly.

Both parents looked terrified and recoiled in horror. Dad, Attila, said:

"Ah tort it wudda bin sum'en lyke poison. Hangin's too good for 'em!"

Merseyside Police are investigating and have removed the children to foster carers for Mr and Mrs Curmudgeon's safety.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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