Written by Ben Macnair
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Topics: TV, Award

Sunday, 21 September 2008

image for Vanessa Feltz wins award
This makes all of those shows I appear in to pay my mortgage seem worth it

Television favourite, outspoken expert on everything, Vanessa Feltz has won the brand new award for 'Best expert on every show she appears in'.

Feltz, who can often be seen on many channels talking on subjects ranging from Television of the past, to Television of the Present, her favourite holidays, wines, and foods has won the award, as she embodies everything that the awarding panel were looking for.

A spokesman for the awards told us that the qualities that they were looking for were 'A certain lack of self-knowledge, a willingness to appear on anything and everything at the drop of a hat, and a level of recognition in the general public that went passed a mild liking'.

It would appear that Big Brother contestants were banned from the awards, but we did not want to point out the fatal flaw in the plan.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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