Written by SpaceElevator
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Topics: John McCain, vagina

Sunday, 7 September 2008

image for McCain: Sarah Palin's Vagina Will Save the Planet

US and A - Citing recent unclassified Pentagon documents, John McCain explained his reason for choosing Alaska Governor Sarah Palin as his running mate to Tom Brokaw on NBC's Meet the Press.

"I chose Sarah for the sheer circumference of her vajayjay," revealed McCain. "They say size doesn't matter, rather it's how you use it. But in this case size does matter."

He continued, "There is a meteor hurtling toward planet Earth. Only Sarah has the ability to stop it with her mighty beaver." Palin (who has given birth five times) could not be reached for comment.

McCain went on to say that he intends to strap Palin to a jumbo jet that will always be on 'hot standby' in the event she is needed. "We offer a different capability from the Obama camp," he added. "No disrespect to Joe Biden, but it is a well-known fact that he has a very small honeypot. Sarah is a great American. I know that she will be able to do all of the things a working mother does and be the Vice President at the same time. And when needed she will be able to capture the meteor as only she can."

Experts with NASA and the Air Force confirmed that the likelihood of an impact event in the next four years is moderate-to-high, thereby reinforcing McCain's claim.

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