Written by Sophie Jayne
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Thursday, 28 August 2008

image for Radcliffe Beat Up By A Bunch Of 5 Year Olds
Bruno with his playmate

Because he is such a charitable young man and because he really does care about the future of our country, acting sensation Daniel Radcliffe (19) took it upon himself to visit his local 'summer holiday club' to read 'Harry Potter stories' to the young children.

"It all began well." Radders told me "Then suddenly this little boy starts yelling at me that I m not doing the right voices for the characters and of course they all agree and before I know it I have an angry mob of five year olds after me!"

Daniel's high security team was quick to react,and were able to get him off the premises before any real damage was done. Although Radcliffe did come away with a nose bleed and a few scratches.

Speaking to Bruno, the five year old that began the commotion I understand where he is coming from "Harry Potter came and he started reading his book but he just didn't do Dumbledore's voice right he did it far too manly and Dumbledore is suppose to be gay so it just wasn't accurate, so yeah me and my boys had to sort him out." said Bruno.

One thing is for sure, Daniel Radcliffe will be stopping donating to children's charities as his new motto is 'let the kids suffer!'

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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