Written by Monkey Woods
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Saturday, 16 August 2008

image for George Michael Lottery Ticket Turns Up In Jeans At Charity Shop
The lottery ticket, complete with spunk stains

The lottery ticket that pop star George Michael said he was looking for when arrested in a Beverly Hills public toilet, has turned up in a pair of jeans in a charity shop in London.

Michael, was arrested by a pretty undercover policeman, Marcelo Rodriguez, who was also 'looking for lottery ticket', in 1998, and charged with 'engaging in a lewd act'.

Michael, real name Georgios Kyriacos Panayiotou, which means 'Bearded One', always protested that he was doing nothing wrong, and that he was just trying to locate the whereabouts of his Lotto ticket to establish if his "numbers had come up".

Yesterday, a woman in the English capital discovered the Lottery ticket in a pair of Armani jeans that she was trying on, along with a crumpled credit card bill in the name of the retired singer.

Panayiotou has had many hits over the years, including Wake Me Up Before You Go Go, Gay anthem I'm Your Man, I Knew You Were Waiting For Me On A Different Corner, and the duet with Elton John, Don, Let Your Son Go Down On Me.

Sergeant Ernest Plod, of the local constabulary who checked the ticket, said:

"It seems to have been a case of Careless Whiskers!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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