Written by Monkey Woods
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Topics: Police, suicide

Wednesday, 20 August 2008

image for Canadian Singer Admits Partial Responsibility For Man's Suicide
Sad waster

Canadian singer, poet and novelist Lenny Coburg has admitted partial responsibility for a man's suicide in Delaware last week.

The man, as yet, still unnamed, was found dead last Saturday hanging by his testicles from a coat hook, say police, after he had listened to several of the more morose albums recorded by Mr Coburg.

Mr Coburg told police in an interview that, although he had sympathy with the man, he couldn't change the way he recorded his songs, just to save this sad waster's life.

Officer Dweeb Parkins of Delaware Police told reporters that his unit had recently uncovered evidence that the man had spent most of his time "surfing the internet" whilst listening to the albums of Mr Coburg as 'background music'.

"This," he said, "was probably not a wise choice under the circumstances.

The police say no charges are to be brought against Mr Coburg, but have asked him to bear in mind what had happened, and to try and pen some songs that had a more rounded sound, and were "less suicidal" in their tone.

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