Written by Jazzy T.
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Wednesday, 19 May 2004

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The WB's Superstar USA? A definite No!

Ryan Seacrest is angry! In fact, he's hopping mad right now.

Seacrest and his American Idol friends are threatening a lawsuit against the WB network, whose new reality series, The WB's Superstar USA, is a direct mockery of the Fox hit show. Like Idol, Superstar is comprised of three judges and a prettyboy host, but what sets the two shows apart is that while Idol rewards the very talented, Superstar does the same thing to the incredibly horrible singers, while kicking out the good ones.

Simon Cowell, whose persona is parodied by Chris Briggs, said: "I wouldn't watch that crap! William Hung could've saved himself the humiliation by appearing on that disaster area of a show."

Paula Abdul and Randy Jackson are equally offended by their respective doppelgangers, Vitamin C and Tone-Loc. Jackson told Celebrity Justice that the Superstar judges wouldn't know real talent if a dog bit them in the rear end, and Abdul suggested that Vitamin C is washed-up anyway.

The WB hired Brian McFayden to act as Seacrest's evil twin. Upon hearing the news, Seacrest angrily went on the air at a Los Angeles radio station and demanded that his loyal listeners boycott the WB and anything related to the Time-Warner group. He also plans to announce the Superstar boycott on his TV talk show, On-Air with Ryan Seacrest.

"It's a big disgrace to reality TV," Seacrest said, and that if the case went to court, he would be represented by Cowell.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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