Written by Joe Leary
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Topics: Music, Fashion

Wednesday, 19 May 2004

image for Disco is back
Disco is not dead

There I was in the early 1980s and the stark reality had set in. Disco was dead! Now, this was probably a good thing for society as a whole since it marked the end of a scourge on the music and fashion industry of the 1970s, but this posed a big problem for me. First of all, what would I do with all my polyester leisure suits, and platform shoes? Will I ever be able to do the "Hustle" again? Secondly, what will become of all my favorite stars who built their legend on disco? Will Gloria Gaynor survive? What about Evelyn "Champagne" King? Saturday nights will never be the same without the Solid Gold Dancers. As time rolled on all these questions would slowly be answered.

Unlike Gloria Gaynor, I did survive the death of disco. Hair metal took over the radio airwaves. My leisure suits went to the Salvation Army, which I believe led to a rise in the number of well-dressed homeless people of the 80s, and were replaced by spandex. Occasionally, on Saturday nights when I miss the Solid Gold Dancers and the mood strikes me I go down my basement, slip on my last leisure suit, pop in my Saturday Night Fever eight track, and let the Bee Gees take me away to "Hustle" heaven.

However, like all popular trends that recycle disco is returning with a vengeance, and it couldn't come at a better time. With all the crap that is on the radio we needed a fresh injection of soul. The comeback is being fuelled by those old time disco bands A Taste of Honey, Chic, KC and the Sunshine Band, and the surviving members of the Village People. But new bands like the Disco Pimps are adding to the fever as well. That's right guys, crank up the bass, break out those gold chains, and big collar polyester shirts we are going to Studio 54.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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