Written by Monkey Woods
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Monday, 9 June 2008

image for Big Brother Housemate Is On The Run From Terror Police
Day 4: vengeance has been wreaked upon the Western infidels

Big Brother 9 got off to an 'explosive start' last Thursady with the news that one of the housemates, is actually an Islamic Fundamentalist on the run from Terror Police.

The housemate, who I cannot name because I would be taken down after a short legal trouncing, told show producers he was a toy demonstrator at a leading toy shop in the capital, but Terror Police enquiries have turned up a different story.

Agent Arthur Bogg, of the Anti-Terrorist Hunter Squad, said:

"We've been having a look at this housemate for a while, and we believe is using the Big Brother House to hide himself, and, of course, to radicalise some of the other Housemates."

Channel 4 executives say that they are not aware of any terrorist activity in the House, but they have promised to monitor every movement of any suspects.

Big Brother host Davina McCall told viewers:

"We can detain Housemates for up to 91 days, subject to a Public Eviction."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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