Written by queen mudder
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Topics: Tom Cruise, Fire, Arson

Sunday, 1 June 2008

image for Universal Studios arson blamed on Tom Cruise hex
Scientology's ritual sigils appeared in smoke plumes above the LA dawn skies

California - (Smouldering Mess): A Tom Cruise hex has been blamed for the suspected arson attack on Universal Studios.

The complex went up in flames today after a mystery explosion, leaving an eerie smoke plume "in the shape of a Scientology ritual sigil" circling the LA dawn skies, according to firefighting sources.

The studios are owned by General Electric and Viacom, the parent company of Paramount Pictures which dumped Cruise in 2006.

"The LA blaze looks like karmic payback for Mission Impossible 3 lousy box office," Dave Skank, movie editor of LA HagFagSlagMag newspaper, said today.

Cruise is known to have been furious with Viacom's endorsement of a South Park episode (Trapped in the Closet) which poo-pooed the actor's claims to heterosexuality.

Katie Holmes is a suspected hostage.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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