Written by matwil
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Topics: Madonna

Tuesday, 27 May 2008

image for Madonna Not In The News Today
'Why am I famous?'

In a surprise move, newspapers and television shows didn't mention Madonna today.

After becoming famous for her only hit, 'Holiday', in the 1980s, Miss Ciccone has appeared daily in magazines and news programmes for no reason except for being alive, but today's lack of coverage even shocked hardened journalists.

Speaking from his office in the Glenfiddich distillery, Sun editor Calvin McAllan said: 'We've put her in our paper every day for decades, but decided the public needed a break from her. I mean, there's a limit to people wanting to know what a dancer that needs a facelift does all the time.' And Guardian entertainment chief Alfred Lord Oxford said: 'Yes, Miss Midge is a rather interesting young lady, her cross-gender race relations stance has sold us a few copies, mate. Lend us a fiver, will ya?'

Madonna herself, taking a break from her latest porn video to save Nigeria, said: 'Um, yeah, OK.' And her wife, Guy Ritchie, added: 'Ok yah, dahling.'

But news stations across the world are preparing themselves for masses of overtime tomorrow, as they'll be back to putting Madonna in the headlines again, for either eating a sandwich after dark or for coughing in an unusual manner.

Zsa Zsa Gabor is 132 today.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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