UK broadcaster ITV was today fined a record £5.6m by regulator OFCOM for the 'never ending stream of puerile drivel spewing from a mediocre network with no sense of quality control'. ITV is said to be conducting a phone-in poll of its board of directors before issuing a formal response.
An OFCOM spokesman said 'Programmes like Doc Martin, Heartbeat, Rosemary and Thyme and The Mint only serve to insult the intelligence of the viewing public. I believe they have all been recommissioned by this bunch of elitist, cash-hungry, half-wits that run the channel.'
Ant and Dec were unable to comment from their houseboats moored in Monaco.