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Thursday, 1 May 2008

image for Manchester crooner Morrissey dropped by label for releasing happy song
Morrissey is ostracised by his record label for being too happy

The singer Morrissey, real name Morris Day, and a brother of Green Day, is being dropped by his music label for releasing an upbeat song.

The song is so happy it has actually been played on Radio 3, discussed on Radio 4 and ignored by Radio 1.

The title of the song, "I'm so Happy" which features a cover version of "I could be so happy…happy, happy, happy" as a B side, takes us through one of Morrissey's self-acclaimed happy times back in 1982, when he once smiled and joked with his postman.

However, he has since only ever been seen wearing dark clothes and scowling, while he sings about death, destruction, cemeteries and a girlfriend who was apparently in a coma. He always claims "heaven knows I'm miserable now!".

A spokesman for his record label, Dee Pressed, said:

"Frankly, Mr Shankley, I fail to see what all the fuss is about. We contracted with Morrissey to produce only depressing songs about suicide, death, depression, disease and mental disorders.

"By singing about something happy and bright, he has in fact breached his contract.

"So I'm sorry, but he has to go."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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