Written by queen mudder
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Friday, 25 April 2008

image for Paris Stilton no longer FHM Magazine Sexiest Women List big cheese
Fromage affreux: Hilton five years ago before her boobs went flabby

London - (Ass Mess): Paris Hilton has slipped to the No#77 slot on FHM Magazine's list of the world's top 100 sexiest women which has crowned Transformers co-star Megan Fox as the ranking's number one babe.

Stilton, 27, took the news badly at her Beverly Hills home today, lashing out at Fox's "ridiculous Syler-style marker-pen eyebrows" and daft tattoo slogan on her back:

"Pity she hasn't got her hourly rate tattooed on her ass same as all the other downmarket slags," the blonde heiress said today.

Britney Spears meanwhile has sunk to No#100 after readers voted her the most terrifying shag prospect ever - given that Papa Spears now controls all her money, dates, medication and contraceptive matters.

Spears at least has made it into the list.

No such luck for top French madam Carla Bruni Sarkozy whose four month marriage is rumored to be heading the same way as Heather Mills' matrimonial affairs.

"When the anaesthetic wore off Carla woke up and realised she'd married a stunted growth and not a virile French male like Opus Dei promised," her PR said today.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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