Written by Ben Macnair
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Topics: Celebrities

Wednesday, 26 March 2008

image for Do you know who I am?
Just to your left, Mr Smith

Shocking reports just launched show that many people actually know who a lot of people are.

Even famous people like him off the TV, and what's her face of the Radio have a very small public following. The report, issued by 'Bigger things are happening in the world.com' shows that very few people actually care about the colour of a Pop Star's new bathroom, or that their new over-heated album of the same old tripe as the last one came from a source of unnuterable personal suffering.

Speaking from his bunker, the writer of the report, a Mr John Leslie Peter Frampton (No relation to the pop guitar player) said: 'It occurs to me, every so often that the trees which are sacrificed to make Heat, or Cool Magazine are giving their lives for no effect. If it was not for these magazines, we would not know about some divorcee getting Millions from her pop star ex, or the colour that J Lo has her pet dogs painted in'.

When Mr Frampton asked us if we were interested in his next report 'Why is the sky blue?' we had to decline his kind offer, saying we did not have enough time for that sort of thing.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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