Written by Pointer
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Topics: Pope

Wednesday, 26 March 2008

image for Pope Ate My Cock!
Pope declares: I don't eat cock or suck ducks

Gossip columnists, tabloid journalists and Italian fellatioists were reeling after chicken farmer; Sicilian Giuseppe Pollo told reporters that Pope Benedict the Sixteenth ate his cock.

The revelation brought back the somewhat fading horror of many of the Roman Catholic Church's scandals. Catholics across the world denounced the Pontiff as an adultophile while others declared him guilty of roostophila.

The Pope tried to explain to throngs of protesters in St Peter's Basilica but the chants of Cock-sucker and Dick-wad drowned out the embattled Vicar of Christ.

Pilgrims disillusioned by the accusations wore bracelets saying: "What would Jesus do with a cock?"

Protest signs appeared across Vatican City asking: "How many times did this cock crow?"

As the scandal began to subside toward Holy Week's end, Farmer Pollo sought to reignite the furor of the populace: "Donta ju understanda, that bastardo ate my best rooster!"

Waterfowl entrepeneur, Luigi Pato sympathized with Pollo: "Thisa Papa iz a no friend to poultry. He sucka my duck, I sweara to God!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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