Written by Sophie Jayne
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Thursday, 20 March 2008

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Ronald Billius Dumbldore

In a chance happening, it has been unearthed that Ron Weasley is not the ginger we all thought him to be.

On a family outing to the DNA lab, Ron casually checked his DNA with a surprising outcome. He was not related to Mr Weasley, this means that saucy Molly Weasley must have had a love affair in the mid eighties.

"Wow this could mean my father could be rich and I wouldn't have to be stuck with a loser poor dad." the ginger one beamed, so the question on all our lips is who is the daddy?

Sneaking into The Burrow wasn't hard as it is so old and falling apart. "I can't say who the father is here." Molly Weasley hissed going slightly red "meet me behind the chicken barn and I'll spill."

"I was young and foolish." she told us later "But he was nice to me and he promised me the earth. It was Dumbledore, he is Ron's father, keep it to yours selves." (Does she not know us?)

Who would have thought Dumbledore had it in him (plus isn't he gay?) still no word on how Mr Weasley is taking the blow.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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