London, England - We have all seen them on the back of commercial trucks (Lorries). Stickers that encourage people on the road to call "1-800-How Am I Driving" to report any driver irregularities. Well, now readers at TheSpoof.com will have that same option to call in and report what they feel are irregularities in any particular story or express their opinion on the author's inability to execute comedic timing to their liking.
In addition to being able to rate a story from one to five stars, now at the end of each published story the reader is encouraged to call toll-free "1-800-How Am I Writing." It is a phone line setup especially to allow readers to voice their approval or contempt for a particular story or author.
"Each caller will have two minutes in which to express themselves, or voice their opinion as to the writer's incompetence," explained an editor at TheSpoof.com. "I, personally, expect to use it rather frequently."
However, it is expected that the majority of callers will use the new "1-800-How Am I Writing" phone line just to interject their two cents worth of anything to say about anybody that no body else cares enough about to hear in the first place.
"Now every Monday quarterback backseat driver armchair writer will be able to harass me with a phone call too?" said one surprised and disappointed spoof writer upon hearing the news. "What? Isn't the star rating and point system humiliating enough?"
Each spoof writer will be issued a special personal identification number (pin) to allow them access to the phone messages left for them on the new automated phone system.
Spoof writers will be encouraged to listen to their voice mail from their readers on a daily bases so as to improve their writing, carefully tailoring it to reflect public opinion. Rather than attempt anything radical like taking it in a different direction so as to maybe, just maybe, improve it.
"Here at the Spoof, I am afraid writers have a tendency to take themselves too seriously and as a result so too do many of their readers," said an editor at TheSpoof.com. "This new phone system is not intended to influence or engineer a writer's opinion. No, no, rather it is intended to let the readers do that all by themselves but in a more efficient and personal manner than ever before."