Playboy Magazine head honcho Hugh Hefner has signed an exclusive mega-bucks deal for a 16 page full color spread of a fabulously endowed 12-nipppled woman.
The shapely Alaskan babe, Cindy De laRue - 52-12-24 - is described as being tall and vivacious with the only downside being a slight bald patch over her left ear.
Discovered by a Catholic priest who was giving 'swimming lessons' to the local girls choir, Cindy's 'talents' soon began to attract attention from the dirty Mac brigade. A few spreads later and Cindy was on her way to Hollywood.
"12 nipples. Boy, oh, boy, oh boy", said Hefner, "that's something we haven't shown before in the magazine".
"She's a stunner", smiled Hef from his mansion, "apart from the little baldness problem. Which is no big deal really. For Christ's sake, we'll only be focusing on the girl's bazonga's anyways".
"Our pictures are real classy and sophisticated", was all Hef would initially tell us.
Upon further probing Hefner added: "The pictures will appear in our Easter-themed edition. Ya know, the 12 apostles, last supper, all that jazz. Let's just say the words 'holy wine' and '12 suckling pigs' are involved".
Perverts everywhere will surely be hot and sticky. And if they aren't, the latest Playboy features a free melted Snickers bar on the cover.