Written by queen mudder
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Topics: Hollywood

Sunday, 24 February 2008

image for Pellicano case: nominations announced for Hollywood's top predator gongs
LaFagHagSlagMag predicts a bloodbath for the bedrock of the US movie industry

Los Angeles - (Worst Ass Mess): Expect a sex, drugs and blackmail earthquake to hit Tinseltown after tonight's Oscars red carpet is rolled out for the last time says a leading article in Hollywood's premier celeb newspaper LaFagHagSlagMag.

The stark message focuses on the bedrock of the US movie industry as it prepares for its annual self-fellation night ahead of the cataclysm in the law courts from March 5 onwards.

LA prosecutors are set to smash the Hollywood predator cabal they say has vampirised law and order while etoilating the very molestors who now bask in megabux boxoffice glory.

In the dock is former private eye Anthony Pellicano and four high profile accomplices.

And in the spotlight will be Hollywood's darkest and best gagged secrets that are rooted in immensely successful 20th century corruption cover-ups of celluloid monoliths like Charlie Chaplin, Walt Disney, Lawrence Olivier, John Wayne and Marilyn Monroe.

"This time they're out to smash Scientology's child molestor puppet-masters," LAFagHagSlagMag editorial sources said today.

"That means tearing down the fiction behind the assassination of Bobby Kennedy and his big brother JFK."

Successive US Administrations have taken the bipartisan view that Kennedy paterfamilias Joseph Kennedy's gangland turf war treaties with the Bush family must be excised from American hystery by the Law of Omerta - even if that means whitewashing the truth about the brothers' contract killings.

How that will square with recently discovered 1960s film footage of Robert Kennedy frolicking naked in a Bel Air pool with Marlon Brando and five other aroused, naked males remains to be seen.

Tom Cruise is Jumping Jack Flash!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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