Written by Jalapenoman
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Monday, 4 February 2008

image for Miley Cyrus Pops Pimple As World Watches
She touched one! She actually touched one!

"Please pass the Clearasil," asked Miley Cyrus of her manager at her latest tween concert/squeal-fest. The fifteen year old television startlet and would be singer had just popped an enormous zit and wanted to be sure that she was protected from another outbreak.

From her dressing room rushed the events center coordinator, trash can in hand, towards the screaming fans outside. "Pimple juice from Miley!" she screamed. "Bidding starts at one hundred dollars for a Puffs with Aloe with Miley's pus and a drop of blood!"

Thousands of eleven and twelve year old girls turned on the "pleeeease" whine and beg to their fathers to open their wallets to buy them the now holy relic from the Tween Goddess. The tissue sold for four hundred and sixteen dollars to an apparent dirty old man in a raincoat from Jersey.

The empty Clearasil box went for $260 only after the Event Center Coordinator promised that she had actually seen Miley touch it and remove the tube herself.

Once it was known that Cyrus used Clearasil as her pimple cream of choice, Walgreens drug stores across the country soon found shelves empty of the product. The drug's manufacturer was also quick to contact Hannah Montana producers about a possible marketing tie in and use of Miley as a commercial spokesperson.

After the starlet had recovered from her harrowing pimple experience, she was ready to perform. The concert was anti-climactic, however, in light of the knowledge that even television princesses can have oily skin and complexion problems.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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