Written by Robert W. Armijo
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Thursday, 24 January 2008

image for Vanessa Hudgens photographed by paparazzo getting frisky with Zac Efron in the ambulance ride back to the ER; EMT gives blow-by-blow account
Vanessa Hudgens deeply engaged in giving oral encouragement, lending Efron a helping hand that she was too busy to talk

Hollywood, California - Half dozen major tabloids are currently engaged in a high-priced bidding war, rumored to be in the millions, over a photo taken by a lucky paparazzo from the rear bay window of the ambulance that transported Vanessa Hudgens and Zac Efron back to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center for the second time this week after he busted a vasectomy stitch.

The illusive racy photo allegedly shows Hudgens giving Efron…Well, let us just say she was so deeply engaged in giving oral encouragement, lending him a helping hand that she was too busy to talk, but if she could have, she would have a mouthful to say.

"It certainly breathes new meaning into the old porno phrase, 'The Money Shot," said Doug Clayborne, a veteran Hollywood paparazzo, regarding the anticipated windfall the paparazzo is expected to get for the latest Vanessa Hudgens racy photo. "When it hits the tabloids, it will be bigger than the nude pictures of her that showed up on the Internet last year."

The following is an excerpt from the unedited transcript from the interview with the emergency medical technician (EMT) present at the time the racy photo was taken by the paparazzo in the back of the ambulance as Hudgens and Efron pulled up to the ER of the Cedars-Sinai Medical Center that evening:

"It was the standard medical advice in the field manual about administering CPR [OR ORAL SEX]," said the timid EMT. "I don't know why you want me to repeat it here but if you say it could save a life, okay then. I guess.

I told Vanessa Hudgens just make sure the air passage way is cleared of any obstructions, [LIKE TONGUE STUDS]. Make sure you have a tight seal around [YOUR LOVER'S PRIVATE PARTS] before blowing [ON YOUR LOVER'S PRIVATE PARTS] then wait for [IT] to rise and fall before you use chest compressions. Also don't forget to check [OUT OF THE MOTEL ROOM BEFORE 11 AM OR] their pulse."

Again, the original transcript goes on to describe the racy photo the paparazzo took, but it will not be released until the sale of the new racy photo is completed.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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