London Dec. 1st 2007: (Ass.Mess.) The acclaimed Spoof Queen and part time Judge, affectionately known as 'The Queen Mudder' has confessed as to how she has become so successful and prolific.
She was sitting in one of her plush offices (The one in Mayfair, London) late one night, typing the latest news in her own inimitable style; taking full advantage of Mark Lowton's absence when her Page droned:
"There's someone to see you Ma'am. Calls himself, Mr Deville, from Worldwide Underground Heating Services Inc."
"Send 'im in!" she hollered.
Beelzebub himself appeared before her. The Devil said to the young lady,
"I have a proposition for you. You can win every case you try, for the rest of your life. Your clients will adore you, your colleagues will stand in awe of you, and you will make embarrassing sums of money."
"All I want in exchange is your soul, your husband's soul, your children's souls, the souls of your parents, grandparents, and parents-in-law, and the souls of all of your friends and law partners."
The Authoress stopped tapping on her keyboard, looked at the Prince of Darkness into his glowing red eyes for a moment, and then asked,
"So, what's the catch?"