Written by Monkey Woods
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Wednesday, 21 November 2007

image for Katie Price Writes Some More Crap Books
She's been busy, alright!

Katie Price, the wife of tiny little Australian singer Peter Andre, has released another batch of books she has been busy writing, just in time for Christmas, and those all-important stocking fillers.

Known to Big Tit lovers as 'Jordan', Price is not really a writer, but is amongst the legions of celebrities that, because they are big and famous, regard themselves as 'worthy scribblers', and set about filling bookshelves with dross that nobody reads.

Price's new books are in the latter category: Katie Price's Perfect Ponies 4 is the latest instalment in the series in which she tries to convince us that she knows something about hooved animals other than her husband. The book is naturally pink.

Being Jordan 6 is another dip into the world of the rich and famous, where readers can experience the daily grind/excitement of sharing a home with a thick woman with huge clangers, and see pictures of her completing mundane tasks, such as washing the pots and ironing, clad in an ill-fitting bikini.

Katie Shows You How To Suck Eggs (And Her Tits) is self-explanatory, as is Soap Suds From Head To Foot, which is only available in hardback.
Perfect Ponies 5: Mucking The Little Bastards Out is due for a January release.

Miss Price rose to fame as the woman who just didn't know when to stop enlarging her breasts, but, since marrying Andre, has only had six more operations, due mainly to local Council-imposed restrictions on her movements in public. Andre said:

"When we go out, we have to erect a scaffold around her for other people's safety."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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