Written by Jesus Budda
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Friday, 16 November 2007

image for 'People' Magazine says Spongebob Squarepants is Sexiest Man Alive
"You sexy mothaf*cka", as Prince might sing

People Magazine has bestowed the honor of "Sexiest Man Alive" upon popular childrens TV star Spongebob Squarepants in its latest issue, on sale now.

Spongebob joins his pals George Bush and muscleman Vladimir Putin, each of whom has earned the title before.

In a letter published in the magazine, Mr Squarepants said "Patrick Starfish and Squidbert are gonna be so jealous! I work out every day in the Aqua gym just to build of this amazing body you see before you."

Spongebob is dating big breasted hotty Carmen Electra, and the two are reported to be "very, very close".

People's "sexiest man alive" list began in 1985 with Pee Wee Herrman. Cheesy male model Fabio made the list in 1987 and '88; Dennis Franz in 1992 and 1994. Other honorees include Sesame Street's Elmo (2004) and Rosie O' Donnell (2006)

Spongebob, star of the eponymous Nikelodeon poorly animated show, was said to be a hit with the readers because of his frank talking and gratuitous nudity sequences.

"Spongebob says and does what mere mortals can only dream of", said People Magazine editor Lucious Levine, "And he's a gay icon, too"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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