BBC 1's misery fest, Eastenders, is to get a new family in a bid to boost flagging ratings.
The Skywalkers, father Annakin, and Brother and Sister Luke and Leia are to move into Albert Square in the new year. The family, who are trying to rebuild their lives together following a traumatic few years are set to replace the Beale family, who will all die in a strange deep fat fryer accident, caused by Wellard the dog, and well-meaning thicko Robbie Jackson, who returns to wreck revenge on those who wronged him.
Annakin, better known throughout the entire galaxy as Darth vader, dresses all in black, and breathes through a mask. Luke is a slightly wet, one handed former farmboy, and Leia is a spoilt Princess, who always gets her own way.
This follows news that a whole flock of Ewoks will be in the new series of 'I am a Celebrity get me out of here' while Chewbacca eats Gordon Ramsay in a forthcoming episode of Hell's Kitchen.
The Emporer (Montgomery C Burns from American documentary The Simpsons) will murder Piers Morgan in the final series of 'You can't fire me, I am famous'.