Written by Mister Meaner
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Topics: Britney Spears, Kids

Saturday, 13 October 2007

image for Britney Spears Awarded Custody Of Two Plastic Dolls To Prove 'Mother-Worth'
Miss Spears' back lawn

Britney Spears, the troubled pop star, has been given custody of two plastic baby dolls, so that authorities can ascertain whether or not she is capable of spending time safely with her children again.

Miss Spears recently had her two sons wrenched from her grasp by ex-husband Kevin Federline, after a Court judged that she was "not fit to be a mother". Now, her attorney has won the right to try and show she is on the road to recovery, and visited the LA outlet of Toys-R-Us on Friday to purchase the dolls.

Anne Kiley told the court that her client would love and cherish the dolls, and put them to bed before midnight, just as she would have done with her own sons, unless it was a Friday or a Saturday, when they would have to go to sleep no later than 3am. She also said that "special arrangements" would be put in place if the star was invited to a party.

The Los Angeles court ruled that a two-week trial period would commence Friday, and, subject to its result, another decision would be made later this month as to whether she was fit to be called a human being again.

Later, Miss Spears left to see her dealer.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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