Written by Jesus Budda
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Friday, 7 September 2007

image for Joan Rivers stretches her face to Antarctica in aid of T.W.A.T.S
Joan Rivers before plastic surgery

Occasionally funny lady Joan Rivers has stretched her face all the way from New York to the ice laden continent Antarctica.

"What can I say, I'm a crazy bitch with an elastic face", said Ms Rivers.

"Your lucky it wasn't my ass.No seriously, it was all in aid of charity. You know how I like to help the sick and poor and all those people.We'll anyway, somebody's dressed real fancy tonite".

Ms Rivers raised a million dollars for T.W.A.T.S, the acronym for Texas Women Against Trouserless Stoners.

"Oh, those ladies are evangelical loonies, but they help the poor with food kitchens and crap like that for homeless guy's who've lost their pants through gambling and stuff", added Joan.

A spokewoman for T.W.A.T.S thanked Joan for her generosity: "With miss Rivers elastic face and kindly donation we can provide a new pair of pants and a bible belt for hundreds of Texan men with drug problems.God bless you Miss Rivers".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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