Written by Monkey Woods
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Wednesday, 5 September 2007

image for Amy Winehouse Goes All 'Mary Poppins'
...helps the medicine go down...

Amy Winehouse, the troubled songstress, has surprised the pop world after announcing details of her new single, which is a cover of an old musical favourite.

Winehouse, who looks like a horse, has recently attracted much media attention due to her endless drug-taking and alcohol consumption, which has, by all accounts, become uncontrollable. She has lost weight by removing some of her earrings, and had refused all help from her rehabilitation clinic, saying that such extreme measures could ruin her popularity.

Now, she has decided to 'clean up her act' in the best possible way, by emulating 'squeaky clean' Julie Andrews in her role as Mary Poppins with her new release Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.

The song has been given a 'funk-up' in Winehouse's own inimitable style, and features several bouts of swearing and other gutter language.

Winehouse's husband and dealer Flake Bielder-Civic told fans on her website that Amy plans to become a model citizen in the Poppins style, and has already started recording tracks for her new album which should be in the shops for Christmas.

Songs from the album include, as well as Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious, other Andrews classics such as 'Feed' The Birds, Chim Chim Cheree, As High As A Kite and the much-loved A Spoonful Of Sulphate, all with a 'modern twist'.

Critics have reacted to the news with astonishment. Stanley Peters of web-based music magazine The Stourbridge Flapper said:

"It's bound to be the Xmas no.1, even though the sound of it is really quite atrocious!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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