Written by Jean Le Fete
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Thursday, 30 August 2007

image for Dolly Parton Turns 90 Years Old
Well Preserved?

Pigeon Poop, Tennessee - Dolly Parton today celebrated her 90th birthday. Most people in attendance were shocked to learn that Dolly was this old.

"Well parts of me are only a few years old," joked Parton referring to her various body parts, lifts, tucks and resurfacings, "I thank Jesus that my breasts are real and not silicon everyday. A good dose of estrogen keeps them perky."

When asked what her secret was to remaining so youthful and healthy she said, "Sex. Mostly sex and all of it with my husband. He does about one I.V. of vitaman E per day."

Parton begins a world tour next week.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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