Written by Robert W. Armijo
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Thursday, 23 August 2007

image for Britney refuses duet with Justin; says she won't sing his Emmy nominated song, 'Junk in a Box'; critics call her decision career suicide
Britney won't sing -- Oh, look, it's Dick in a box. I wonder, how did he get in there?

Hollywood, California - After taking a week off his busy career to help revive hers, former girlfriend, Britney, stood up Justin Timberlake by refusing to fly out to his Virginia Beach studio to record a duet with her former beau. According to Britney's publicist, she refused to sing with Timberlake because she did not care for song selection he made for them. Music industry critics call her decision career suicide.

"Britney just didn't see how singing, "'Junk' in a Box" as a duet with Justin would help further her career," said a spokesman for Britney. Music industry insiders doubt that is the reason, however.

"It doesn't sound like a legitimate professional disagreement between two accomplished artists;" said an industry insider. "Song selections are negotiated well in advanced of their scheduled recording date. If there was a disagreement between the two, it would have come up way before."

It is rumored it, instead, it had everything to do with the fact that Britney herself perceives she is accepting charity from a nice guy she dismissed with a girl-on-girl kiss with Madonna on a national broadcast of VMA Awards with him sitting in the audience after their much publicized breakup.

Britney's spokesmen then later released the following prepared statement:

Unfortunately, due to the fact that the airline industry does not have safety restraining devices (safety belts) for children on their planes, Britney thought to act in the best interests of her children by canceling her flight out to her recording secession with Mr. Justin Timberlake. Rather than compromise the safety of her children by fly with them without safety restraint devices. Perhaps this will be the wakeup call the airline industry needs to take assertive action now to correct this problem. Until then, Britney refuses to fly out and do a duet with Timberlake.

Britney and her spokesman refused further comment on the matter.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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