LONDON (Defecated News) - An British A-List celebrity is reported to have had his penis cut off in a freak accident last night. We are not able to give his name, but the details of the accident are clear.
'The Star' was driving back to London after having dinner with friends, when his current girlfriend started a 'sex act' on him while he was driving her old Mitsubishi car.
At the point of climax, 'The Star' started shouting loudly with excitement and lost control of the wheel causing the passenger's side to fall into a roadside ditch. The resulting impact caused 'The Star's' lover to forcefully tighten her jaw, resulting in the 'loss of member'.
He is stable and should make a full recovery from re-attachment surgery, according to plastic surgeons at the Cromwell Hospital in West London.
Hugh Grant was unavailable for comment.