A washed up pop star, who never wrote a lyric of his own has been complaining to anyone who will pay about the downturn in his career.
Wearing Spandex over his beer belly, and blonde highlights in his rapidly receding hair the man who's name is only familiar to his parents bitterly complained over a Lemon J20.
"I had everything going for me. The looks of my generation, the voice of my decade, the finest songwriter's writing for me, the best musicians playing on my albums, and then one day it just stopped, and now all I have to show for it is my multi million pound houses, 15 children by 14 different women, and my memories. I am only young, I want to hang onto my youth for a little while longer."
We left him eating curly fries, and three milkshakes, after the first five minutes of an hour long interview. Sometimes, life really is too short..