Written by ChillerBaggins
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Wednesday, 11 July 2007

image for Megan Fox - Dope on a one-way ticket to Palooka-ville!
Donkey Girl - Megan Fox

HOLLYWOODLAND (The Studios) -- Transformers star Megan Fox should have kept her mouth shut and now has a lot of enemies in Hollywood, a place she said is full of cocaine abusers. She's been sent to Oblivion (Ari.).

"I've done drugs, and that's how I know I don't like them. I tried several things in order to make an informed decision, but I didn't enjoy anything other than marijuana." Megan said. "I don't even think of it as a drug - it should be legalized."

"I actually went to Bible camp when I was 11. Bible camp is fucking awesome -- you sing songs about Jesus and then you do arts and crafts about Jesus. One night, I snuck out to meet the first boy I ever had a crush on. Each cabin had two counselors, so it was really difficult. I had the balls, but he was too chickenshit."

Kicked out of Hollywood for being the Antichrist -- and sent to a kibbutz in Oblivion, Arizona, Megan said, "You don't understand. I coulda had the 'A' list. I coulda been a star. I coulda been a paparazzi tart, instead of a pot-head, which is what I am -- let's face it."

"I used to pee in Hollywood swimming pools. They're full of coke -- that kills all the bacteria as soon as you do it."

Megan appears to have fallen foul of the -- No sex tape and your out -- craze sweeping tinseltown. The former 21-year-old actress-and-model has had time to release six sex sequels.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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