Written by SpaceElevator
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Topics: TV, suicide

Monday, 2 July 2007

image for Desperate 'House Husband' Attempts Hara-Kiri Over TV Programming

SEATTLE (Post-Intelligencer) - A stay-at-home dad attempted ritual suicide after being exposed to too many women's interest TV programs.

The practice of hara-kiri (or more correctly seppuku -- which means "cutting the belly") is a part of the Samurai code and is generally used by warriors to avoid falling into enemy hands or to lessen shame.

Nathan John, who sold aromatherapy candles from his home, was found unconscious and badly-injured in the bathroom by his wife Krystal. A note found at the scene mentioned the fact that too much exposure to 'Ellen', 'Oprah', 'Desperate Housewives' and 'Sex and the City' had driven him beyond his breaking point.

The man is currently recovering in the hospital with a suicide watch and a TV filter that prevents viewing of soap operas and any other women's interest programs.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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